MLNOL
by Mediancat
Summary: Willow and a rookie Slayer go to an island off of North Carolina to track down a vampire -- and get caught up in the island's weird reverence for its founder.
1. Chapter 1

Author's Note/Disclaimer: _Yes_, I will finish Martian Manhunter, and That's What You'll Take to the Grave. In the meantime, enjoy this little story -- I am ever on a quest to do the most obscure crossovers I can. This story is set in a nebulous post-season 7 timeframe; I don't follow season 8 continuity.

The island of Nollop, its inhabitants, and the background plotline are the work of Mark Dunn, who created the fabulous novel _Ella Minnow Pea_, from which they're taken. Joss created Willow and Giles. Emma-Lynn Noell is my original character, one of the Slayers activated by Willow's spell, as are Moon and her underlings.

M L N O L

ABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSTUVWXY-

The quick brown fox jumps over the la-y dog

M L N O L

Nollopton

Thursday, August 10

Dear Mr. Giles,

Willow and I got here with no problems, except that we had to charter a boat here -- there's no airport on the island and the tourist traffic, apparently not that big to begin with, has been almost completely halted. (I also see now why you wanted me to come along -- they have limited phone use and no internet. Willow's already going cra -- er, insane -- but I'm used to writing letters. Thank God for Miss Manners, I say.)

When we got there, we found out why. We hadn't been off the boat for ten minutes when Willow and I started hashing out where we were going to find Moon and her underlings. Willow mentioned "You know, that crazy vampire could be anywhere on the island -- the entire thing is on a magic node, you know, kind of like a Hellmouth only, you know, not as mean --"

I was starting to drift off -- a combination of Willowbabble and technobabble tends to do that to me -- when a Nollopton police officer came up to us. He tapped Willow on the shoulder and said, "Excuse me, miss, you're going to have to come with us."

"What? Vampire? Did I say vampire? I meant, umpire. You know, Emma, that retired major league umpire we're looking for --"

"Not what we meant, miss. Come along."

They didn't have any problems with me going with her, so I followed them. You would have thought we were going to end up in a police station, but instead went to the center of town, where the officer showed us a statue of a dude who turned out to be the island's founder, Nevin Nollop. Around the pedestal were the words, "The quick brown fox jumps over the la-y dog ." The officer explained to us that this sacred sentence -- his words, not mine -- was the creation of Mr. Nollop, and contained every single letter in the alphabet. Now that the -- the 26th letter had fallen out, that was a sign from the "Revered Nollop" that that letter was no longer to be used in speech or writing, and that this was to serve as our warning. As we were tourists, we would not have our personal effects taken from us, but we were to keep them in the hotel at all times, and that otherwise we would be bound by the same laws everyone else had to follow.

He was disappointed when we didn't shout out an amen or something, but he let us go to our hotel after that.

When we got there, Willow said, "That's cra--"

"Willow --" I said.

"Well, it is."

"Of course it is. Still. When in Nollop, don't as the Nollopians don't. So, how are we going to find Moon?"

We hashed out some strategies for a while after that. Asking around would be more difficult without using the 26th letter, but I'm going out tomorrow to do that, and Willow's going to try something magical. We suspect the Nollopians don't want their homeland to become the staging ground for Moon's extradimensional masters any more than we do.

Sincerely,

Emma-Lynn


	2. Chapter 2

AMr. Giles:

Willow, unfortunately, had no luck using magic to track down Moon; the entire island apparently gives out a low-level interference that means that Willow won't be able to track down Moon's gateway until we're practically right on top of it -- and by that time we probably wouldn't need the spell any more. She has some ideas on that front and will be heading back to the mainland; no, she wouldn't tell me what they were, you know how the girl loves her dramatic reveals. The only thing she said was, "Where Sean O'Lochlain can't do the job, you call in Lincoln Rhyme." I didn't get the references. She's leaving tomorrow.

In the meantime, I had a little more success. Nollop's too small to have a demon bar, but there is a public coffee shop where they apparently like to hang out (offering "long green squash bread," and yes, it was exactly what you'd think -- still, most people don't seem to be having a problem avoiding letter 26). The proprietor, once he learned who and what I was, told me that the local demons kept vampires off the island when they could and were mostly interested in maintaining a low profile. Nollop isn't tiny, but it's small enough.

Olm -- that was the owner's name -- told me that Moon, and about a half dozen followers, had come in there a couple of mornings ago looking for recruits, but had left when they weren't able to find any. Not entirely sure he was telling the truth -- he kept looking up nervously at one of the other demons there -- looked like he was half Burchells and half Polgara. I fixed what he looked like in my head. Still, the place didn't seem like it was invasion headquarters. I'll keep you posted.

Sincerely,  
Emma-Lynn

M L N O L

Warren, MD  
Wednesday, August 16

Ms. Noell:

Willow would not inform me either, though I do note that Lincoln Rhyme is the protagonist of a series of successful mystery novels by Jeffery Deaver. Make of that what you will.

In the meantime, she also informs me that our letters are being read by representatives of the Nollop High Council. I cannot say I approve, though as you say, it is their island and they are permitted to do as they wish. I do wonder if perhaps we should be more elliptical in our references, though so far they do not appear to have objected.

Continue with your efforts. For my part, I am working my way through a maze of paperwork and books concerning Nollop and its founding to ascertain if perhaps we can get more of an understanding on Moon's efforts and plans. I will let you know what I discover.

Sincerely,  
Rupert Giles

M L N O L

OFFICE OF HIGH ISLAND COUNCIL  
Nollopton  
Saturday, August 19

Ms. Noell:

It is my duty to inform you that the ban on the 26th letter of the alphabet applies to all correspondence on the island, whether it be incoming or outgoing. You will not be punished, but Mr. Giles, should he use the forbidden letter in the future, will be banned from writing to you for the duration of your stay on the island.

A copy of this missive is being sent to Mr. Giles. You have both been warned.

Sincerely,  
Hamilton Ferguson  
Chief Secretary  
Island High Council

M L N O L

Nollopton  
Friday, August 25

Mr. Giles:

Where's Willow? I certainly would have expected her back by now. I hope none of Moon's followers got to her on the mainland, though if they did they'd probably be the ones in trouble. Still. Let me know.

My efforts have been stalled for the last week; Moon and her underlings have pretty much completely gone to ground, and my one lead, the Polgara/Burchells, has been very careful not to lead me anywhere -- until today. I saw him in the street and followed him, at a distance, until he was well out into the Nollopian wilderness. I lost him, but caught up again a bit later, when I looked down into a small canyon -- too far down for me to jump into -- and overheard a ritual which I was not able to disrupt. It seemed to be centered around an idol of some sort, though the only wording I could actually make out was "sphinx of black quart_, judge my vow." That should narrow it down. (The blank is the missing letter 26, of course.)

I marked where I was so I could try to find a way back, and went back to Nollopton.

Oh: And this is the last time I'll be able to use the letter Q. Seems it fell off the inscription as well, and the High Island Council has informed us that it's banned from here on out.

So don't use it!

Please?

Emma-Lynn

ABCDEFGHIJKLMNOP-RSTUVWXY-

The -uick brown fox jumps over the la-y dog


End file.
